The Miracle Of Adoption

We would not be celebrating Jackson's 1st birthday if it weren't for the miracle of adoption and Jackson's birth parents. I would feel ungrateful if I didn't acknowledge the beauty of that miracle. We always felt that adoption would be a part of our life and we did not realize how truly amazing adoption is until we experienced it first hand.
I never thought I would say this but I am truly grateful for our infertility. There are still times that it slaps me around a little bit, but it is few and far between now. I know that there are conversations I will never be a part of and I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to have felt Jackson kick inside of me (but that is a bond between Jackson and his BM that I would NEVER take from them) I now see a pregnant woman and often think how lucky I am to experience the great love of a birth mother. I feel so lucky that I get to have Jackson's BM in my life. We are connected for life and the gratitude and love Justin and I feel for her is something that words could never express. I know that everything happens for a reason and I am so happy that adoption is the way our family is to be formed.
One year ago today we got the news that Jackson was born. It was the middle of the night when we got a text from our BM that she was in labor and on her way to the hospital. When I heard this I was literally running all over the house wanting to be there so badly. We already had plane tickets for the next day. We tried to change them but the airport we were flying into is small so we could not get out there any sooner. Then a few hours later we got the call that our sweet baby boy was born. We wanted to be there so bad but we didn't make it to the hospital until nine that night. We were a wreck all day. We knew he was in good hands though which helped a ton. He was with his birth parents who love him. When we got to the hospital nobody could have prepared me enough for that moment when we met our son for the first time. I think I felt a million different emotions. I felt overwhelming love for this sweet baby who I had dreams of having for years. I also felt so heartbroken for his birth parents. I wanted so badly to take their pain away and knowing that there was nothing I could do broke my heart. There was a very sweet and precious moment in the hospital that I will never forget. It was just the five of us in the room and Justin and I were holding our sweet little miracle and Jackson's birth parents were across from us holding each other. I looked up and saw his BM looking down at Jackson with the most beautiful look of love I have ever seen. At that moment I felt such an overwhelming feeling of love, humility, and gratitude. It is a look I will never forget and a story I will tell Jackson of often of how that quiet dark room was filled with so much love, all for him. I am in aw of the loving sacrifice Jackson's birth parents made. They are so dear to our hearts. They made us parents and most importantly made us a family. We love you guys!